I think it’s easy to talk about how hard certain parts of life can be.
And it’s easy to complain.
And sometimes I think people secretly find pleasure in knowing that you are struggling so they will ask you about it just to hear the admission. I think it makes them feel better about their own lives and lets them know that they aren’t alone in whatever it is they are struggling with. If we can hear other people admit that their life isn’t perfect then we find peace in knowing that ours isn’t either.
But what a vicious and negative cycle that can be. Recently I’ve made a cognitive decision to not complain to anyone. Period. No complaining. Not about the weather or being tired or my husband not doing something right or a work issue or plans we made or a crying baby or the food I eat. Nothing. If you’ve never tried to not complain about ANYTHING for a whole day, I urge you to try it. It will force you to be aware of how much you really do it.
News flash – it’s probably A LOT more than you think. If you want to take it even further, try replacing whatever complaint you were going to say with something positive about it instead. Now not only do you have to bite your tongue and not vent about your (probably small) inconvenience, but you have to say something positive about it/them instead.
It’s hard. Like really hard. And I fail at it every day. But the more I at least attempt it, I see the positives in my everyday life and not so much of the negatives. There’s just something about knowing you can’t complain about it that makes you just ignore it to begin with. If you can’t complain about your husband, coworker, friend, dinner, baby, weather, house, life, then what’s the point of even recognizing that thing that’s bothering you anyway? And if you force yourself to say something positive about it instead, pretty soon the positives are all you’re going to see. Pretty soon you’ll see that half empty stained up glass that your damn husband didn’t wash correctly as a glass half full of your favorite wine that he poured for you.
Much easier said than done, but that’s my challenge for you today.